9/29/2009

No Naps. Need Help!

My little one spent most of last week sick. No flu. No strep. Just a sore throat, fever and pitiful. So, I spent most of my week with him on me, sleeping. I couldn't help it. He was just so sick. I wanted him to feel better.

Anyway, where that's left us is Michael Dean refusing to nap in his crib. (Yes, he's still in his crib because he's never tried to climb out and loves it in there. Still does at night. Thank God!)

He's barely 2 and I just don't feel like he should be giving up naps yet - but I'd love some feedback from you mommies out there. When did your little ones stop napping? If you felt it was too early, how'd you get them back to taking naps?

And, when I say that he's "refusing" to nap, I mean that when I try to put him in his crib at naptime he freaks out and screams at me that he wants to "lay down" and "cover up" with mommy. He won't cry himself to sleep. I tried, Saturday, for an hour and he just screamed the entire time. I then got him up and rocked him (because that's what he wanted) and he was asleep in minutes.

So, help, please!

(Side note, he's at "school" 4 days a week where they require a 2.5-hour naptime. If he doesn't nap, he's forced to stay on his mat for the entire time. My kid needs to still nap. Seriously.)

7 comments:

Jen B said...

Evan stopped napping when he was a late 2 year old, almost 3. But then, the only reason that we didn't let him nap was because if we let him nap for even 5 minutes, he would be up that night until midnight. At that point, he just really didn't need a nap anymore.

It sounds like your situation is different...sounds like he's just gotten used to having you rock him to sleep while he was sick. I have to say that it's hard, but you should really try to get him back in the habit of going to sleep on his own. Eric and I gave in for a long time....we would hold him until he was completely asleep, and it was impossible to get to sleep without our hour long routine, holding him and laying with him, each night. And I'm talking up until about 2 weeks ago. Finally, at almost age 6, he's going to bed by himself again. Holding him while he went to sleep, was, I have to confess, one of the worst things we did. It made bedtime so hard once he got older.

Try not to let it spiral into what happened with us! It's so hard to reverse. I would say stand your ground, and create the routine of it all over for him, just as you did before he got sick. Maybe offer a stuffed animal for him to hold, stay calm, and speak softly to him, so that he knows you're not upset by what's going on.

That's probably not much help, but I just wanted to let you know what happened with us.

Courtney said...

Thanks Jen for your comments! Yes my goal since MD was teeny-tiny was for him to go to sleep on his own. And he has done that so well, until now.

He is still going down fine at night - thank goodness! It's the naptime that's torture. I've tried the leaving him in and walking away thing, but he screams at/for me. He won't settle himself down. I just can't take that - I'll end up breaking everything in our house! I really don't think he'd ever just settle back into his routine doing it that way.

So, I'm stuck. I can't calm him down enough to get him to lay in his crib...

Jen B said...

Sorry...I don't know what to say. Do you think he would calm down if he had something to entertain him in his crib, like music or a toy? I know that I hear a lot of people talking about "quiet time", rather than "nap time". Or maybe if you sit in his room with him and read a story, he would gradually get more comfortable again in his crib. I don't know, really. Just random thoughts.

Anonymous said...

Hey Courtney! Sorry about MD giving you trouble with nap time (aka only time mommy has to do other things time). Jen B. had great suggestions! I am a stickler for nap time...the twins still nap and they are almost 5. How did I do that? I am heartless! I let them cry and scream for their naps when they were younger. I honestly think MD will get use to it especially since he has to take one at daycare. Jen B's suggestion about reading him a story is great..maybe while he is in the crib?? I would say let him scream and you go clean your house like a mad woman..at least that will give you something to do while he screams!! Hope he settles down soon! Love ya, Ashley

Courtney said...

Ash - Thanks! The cleaning thing is actually a really good idea. All I can do when he's in there screaming is sit like a zombie on the couch because it upsets me so much. It's nice to hear you were ruthless with the twin's naptimes. Makes me feel a little better!

Jen - You know, funny you say the toy in the crib thing. Because (long story short) he ended up with his flashlight in his bed this morning. It really calmed him down. Maybe he's realized he's afraid of the dark?! We'll see...

Thanks again :)

Melanie said...

I agree with both Ash and Jen B. We had a similar thing with Mallory. A few naptimes she cried for an hour and a half until she fell asleep exhausted. I don't think it's heartless...you're doing what's best for your child, even though THEY don't think it's best. You can do it, C. It's not a bad thing for you to let him cry. From my experience, I'm gonna give you a little bit o' advice: MD is figuring out how to manipulate you. Don't let him win! Stick to your guns; you're the mommy and in charge: he is not in charge. You CAN endure the crying, even though you feel like you'd rather dig your eyeballs out with a spoon. It's only temporary...really.

Sorry that you're dealing with this, but this is a good way for you to give him a little tough love. Better at 2 than at 12 or 22...

Anonymous said...

You "mommies" are wonderful. It's GREAT to read comments from parents that CARE and will fight the system & raise children w/the tools to go out into the world and make something of themselves rather than taking the EASY road. Gives me hope that MD's generation just might be the ones to turn this fallen world arould. Your words are very uplifting to me as a NaNa. I know Courtney is doing a wonderful job as I now see all of you are and again THAT IS WONDERFUL. I CONGRATULATE EACH OF YOU FOR STANDING YOUR GUNS AND RAISING CHILDREN TO BE "PROUD" OF.....NaNa PS: you are right about the fight at the Icenhours house,,,ha, ha, ha,,,,LIL MAN is extremely intelligent and battles for control knowing all it takes is looking into those beautiful "blue" eyes and NaNa is hooked. Thank each of you for standing by Courtney. You are the best support system there is.......